3 classic scary stories ruined by modern twists

What if some classic, short scary stories were given modern twists? I updated three short scary stories that are classics for campfires and slumber parties. First, I’ll list spoiler-filled reminders of the original scary stories. Of course, these classic spooky tales always change slightly depending who is telling them, but here are the general ideas:

  • The Hook – A couple is getting amorous in a car parked in a secluded spot when the radio announces that a killer with a hook for a hand is on the loose. They leave, and when they get home they find a hook attached to the door handle.
  • The Monkey’s Paw – A magical monkey’s paw will grant three wishes to its owner. Unfortunately, it grants each wish in horrible ways, such as when a man wishes for a large sum of money and ends up getting that exact amount as a settlement when his son is killed in an accident. The wish fulfillment gets worse from there.
  • Go Check the Children – After the children are in bed, the babysitter keeps getting phone calls saying, “Go check the children.” She calls the police and when they trace the calls they find that the calls are coming from inside the house (something that could happen with land lines that had different extensions) and were being made by the person who had already killed the children.

Remember those? Here are my modern twists on those classic, short scary stories.

The Hook

A couple was parked in a secluded spot doing what couples tend to do when parked in secluded spots, but the girl pulled away.

“I want to go home.”

“What? Are you scared that some killer is going to get us?”

“No. I’m scared I’m going to miss curfew and get grounded again.”

“Okay. Fair enough. I don’t want your mom pissed at me either.”

When he turned on the car he thought he saw in the rear view mirror a person running out of the taillights. He gasped and looked over his shoulder.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

On the drive home he convinced himself that he hadn’t seen anything at all. When they got to his girlfriend’s house he got out of the car to walk her to the door. As he walked around the back of the car he saw a silver hook.

“Shit!”

“Now what?”

“I thought I saw someone back there. He must have been stealing my Flying Spaghetti Monster emblem. It’s gone. All that’s left is one little silver hook of tentacle that broke off.”

“People are assholes.”

“Seriously.”

flying spaghetti monster

Not a Monkey’s Paw

“A man told me the thing was supposed to be magic. All I had to do was say what I wanted and my wish would be granted. But that was too good to be true. I could tell it want I wanted, but it would twist my words. It would bring back something sort of like what I said, but there was always something horribly wrong with what it gave me.”

“Are you talking about an evil monkey’s paw?”

“No, I’m talking about my iPhone. I’m talking about Siri.”

iPhone Siri

Go Check the Children

After she put the children to bed the babysitter went downstairs to do some work on her laptop. After a little while she got an email from an address she didn’t recognize. The message said, “Go check the children.”

She ignored it.

A few minutes later she got another message.

“Go check the children.”

She replied, “Not funny, Eric.” Eric was her boyfriend.

She got a message back, “Who’s Eric?”

So she called him.

“Not funny,” she said.

“What?” Eric said. “Aren’t you supposed to be babysitting?”

“I am,” so stop sending me those creepy emails.

“I’m not sending you anything. I’m playing Xbox. You got an email from me?”

“No, but I figured you made up a fake account to freak me out. There. I just got another one.”

“Send it to me.”

“Sent.”

“Hmm. Someone is definitely messing with you. Do me a favor. Click ‘show original header information’ and send me that.”

“Okay. Can you figure out who is sending these things?”

“Maybe.”

“Did you get it?”

“Yeah.”

“Does that tell you anything?”

“Get out of the house. Get out of the house now!”

“Why? What’s wrong?”

“The computer that sent those messages is on the same network as where you sent me your email from. The emails are coming from inside the house!”

All Eric heard was a muffled scream as the killer put his hand over the babysitter’s mouth.

Go check the children

*     *     *     *     *

Okay, maybe that last scary story still works with the modern twist.

If you like short scary stories check out these:

For the month of October, Listing Beyond Forty is Listing Toward Halloween, featuring posts related to or inspired by Halloween. Read all the previous posts here.

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