October 12: Questions

The October Diary is a work of fiction originally released serially during October 2015. The complete list of posts can be found here.

October 12th

Does anyone else know the Man with the Shadow Voice? Does he haunt anyone else’s dreams? Has anyone else seen him in real life?

What do people see when the Man with the Shadow Voice has followed me on the street? What did they see when he talked to me? What did they see when he came to tell me I had to die?

Did they see nothing? Was I there alone, talking to myself? Did I look as crazy as I know this sounds?

Did they see him? And if they could see him, was he as frightening to them as he is to me? If they could see him, why didn’t anyone try to help me?

If they saw him perhaps they knew who he was, and they knew there was nothing for them to do.

I worry that I’m imagining all this. That I’m going crazy. That there is no Man with the Shadow Voice. That I’m just a lonely woman feeling sorry for herself.

This book is my evidence, but of what? These are just my thoughts and my words. If I’m losing my mind these mean nothing.

But the fear is real. I look around during the day expecting to see him on a street corner or across from me in my train car. At night I hear him in the darkness by my bed. He has followed me my whole life. I know he is real.

But I still think, what if? What if October 31st comes and goes, and I’m still here. What does that mean? I’m so resigned to never see November the shock of being alive could kill me.

What happens next? Read the next part of the story here.

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