Pittsburgh responds to my six reasons not to move there

Yes, I did it. I wrote a post called “Six real reasons not to move to Pittsburgh.” Yes, I knew it would rile some people, but I figured the reaction would be mostly limited my friends in Pittsburgh. Boy was I wrong. Here are some highlights of responses to my list of Pittsburgh annoyances.

A few people pointed out that none of the things I listed were serious enough complaints to justify not moving to a city. Sheesh, Pittsburgh. Lighten up. You may know the meaning of the word “confluence” but a few of you should brush up on the word “hyperbole.” (Oddly no one complained when I said that a reason to move to Pittsburgh is to get cookies that one can easily order off the Internet.)

A few people did point out my error in thinking the USX Tower was now called the UPMC tower.

Phew. It’s not actually rebranding it’s just corporate vandalism. Much better.

Others pointed out that people call it the Steel Building or US Steel Building not the USX Tower. However, since I worked for US Steel in that building when it was officially named the USX Tower the official branding got pounded into my brain like the probe of a Rockwell Hardness test. (There are still some metallurgical terms still rattling around in the old noggin as well.)

Being tweeted at wasn’t that much of a surprise, but I didn’t expect that my post would inspire a response post, much less multiple ones.

@JamesForeman, who I follow on Twitter but really know nothing about, wrote a post titled “6 real reasons not to ever go to Pittsburgh, ever.” Here’s a highlight:

Roving Packs of Wild, Murderous Dogs. Never, ever go outside in Pittsburgh at night. If you do, carry some raw meat to throw as a diversion.

He has a point. It was irresponsible of me not to warn you about the roving packs of wild, murderous dogs.

But that wasn’t the only response article posted. Virginia Montanez, the blogger formerly known as PittGirl, wrote a column for Pittsburgh Magazine in response.

I should note that it was Ginny tweeting out my article that brought it to the attention of so many kneejerkingly irate yinzers. I should also note that I’m a big fan.

Although sadly not published as regularly as they used to be her “What they’re really thinking?” recaps of Steelers games are one of my favorite reasons for the Internet. (WTRT is to Steelers games what Mad Style is to Mad Men episodes.)

Anyway, Ginny took some umbrage at what I wrote and wrote a rebuttal here.

(Her rebuttal has a goat theme yet she doesn’t mention the Cubs once. Is she that subtle, or did she miss the boat? You be the judge.)

And there is at least one more rebuttal to my post although it’s really more of pre-buttal. Before I wrote “Six real reasons not to move to Pittsburgh” I wrote “Six real reasons to move to Pittsburgh” in which I listed some of the things I miss most about Pittsburgh. I’ve also written about cool things that go on in Pittsburgh here and here.

I lived in Pittsburgh for 14 years. That’s longer than I’ve lived anywhere else. I wasn’t born there. I don’t live there now, but if I have a hometown it is Pittsburgh. Anyone who thinks I don’t love Pittsburgh is a jagoff.

Hey, let’s pretend this all didn’t happen. Remember when I wrote an embarrassing story about sexually harassing an NSA polygrapher and people laughed? Yeah. Let’s be more like that again.

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